Source of mutual growth 浪漫跨国恋

何航

许多人都憧憬一场浪漫跨国恋，然而现实却是骨感的。跨国恋要面对的不仅仅是种族和国别的不同，更有文化背景的差异。一起来听听几对跨国情侣的看法吧！

Speaking of the recipe for love, the ingredients are all too familiar: tolerance, care, integrity, trust and so on. However, theories cannot always fix problems in real life. Here, three couples share their stories on having a relationship with someone from a totally different cultural and social background.
说到爱情的保鲜秘籍，其实大家都十分熟悉：包容、关心、诚实、信任等等。然而，理论并不总能解决现实中的问题。下文中，三对来自完全不同的文化和社会背景的跨国情侣和我们分享了他们的故事。

Communication
沟通
No matter how good one’s English is, when it comes to communicating with someone you love, words are sometimes not enough.
哪怕你英语再好，当你与爱人沟通时，常常会有词穷之感。
Zhang Yiqi, a Portuguese major at Shanghai International Studies University is very lucky. Her German boyfriend has been learning Chinese in a language school for a year and can speak Chinese. So they speak Chinese to each other.
来自上海外国语大学西班牙语专业的张亦琦就十分幸运，她的德国男友已经在一所语言学校学习了一年的中文。所以，他们可以用中文沟通。
“His Chinese is not only very good, but sounds like northeastern Mandarin, just like me,” Zhang says. “However, when we encounter phrases from poetry or historic events, our conversations turn into long explanations with both story telling and picture drawing.”
“他的中文不是很好，而且跟我一样带有东北口音，”张亦琦说。“然而，每当遇到古诗或者历史事件时，为了解释其中的缘由，我们的对话总是会转变成一长串‘看图讲故事’。”
Huo Yan, 24, a consultant at PricewaterhouseCoopers agrees. She is dating Cedric Durieux, a French man working at China Radio International. Because her French is not that good, they have to speak English to communicate. But sometimes, there are words that she can’t understand. Then they rely on body language or giving a specific explanation, or even searching for a picture on the Internet.
普华永道会计师事务所咨询顾问、24岁的霍焱十分同意张亦琦的观点。她的法国男友在中国国际广播电台工作。霍焱的法语并不好，所以他们之间只好用英语来交流。但有些时候，她还是会碰到一些生词，每次遇到这种情况，他们只好运用肢体语言或给出具体说明，甚至上网搜图。

何航

Finance
财务问题
Huo Yan, 24, is a finance consultant based in Beijing. Her ex-boyfriend ticked all the boxes of being a Chinese man in love: paying for bills in the restaurant, taking care of both carrying and buying clothes in shopping malls. However, this behavior made her feel uncomfortable. “I think I would feel less pressured if I didn’t feel like I owed anybody anything,” Huo said.
霍焱的前男友具备中国男士恋爱时的一切特点：吃饭买单、血拼时充当搬运工和“刷卡机”。但是这种行为总是让她觉得很不自在。“我认为，当自己心里对别人没有亏欠时，就会轻松许多。”霍焱说。
Now, Huo splits the bills for dinner with her French boyfriend and goes shopping by herself. Of course, whenever there is a small gift from her boyfriend on special occasions such as a holiday or anniversary, she is very happy.
现在，霍焱不仅和法国男友外出聚餐时采用AA制，购物也是自己买单。当然，如果在节日或纪念日等特别的场合收到男朋友送的小礼物，她还是非常开心的。

何航

Lifestyle
生活方式
Wang Qihua, 23, an English major at Tsinghua University, who has a French boyfriend, can’t understand why her boyfriend only drinks coffee in the morning without eating anything, which she considers unhealthy. Likewise, her boyfriend can’t understand why she always drinks hot water.
23岁的王棋画是清华大学英语系的学生，她的男友也是一名法国人。她十分不理解，男友早餐时为何只喝咖啡不吃其他东西，她认为这种习惯很不健康。同样，她的男友也很不理解她为什么总是喝热水。
In the case of such habitual differences, Wang says that as long as they feel comfortable with each other, there is no need to pursue uniform lifestyles.
对于这些习惯上的差异，王棋画说只要他们彼此感觉舒服，就没有必要去追求步履一致的生活习惯。
What bothered Wang more were differences in their outlook on life and the future. Studying hard and trying to improve her resume through social work and high grades, Wang thinks it’s important to have a successful career. But her French boyfriend doesn’t seem to care much about the future. “At first, I thought my boyfriend was lazy. He didn’t work as hard as me,” Wang says. Her boyfriend didn’t rush to find internships like many Chinese students.
最让王棋画困扰的是他们在对待人生和未来上的分歧。努力学习，通过各种社会实践和高分来完善自己的简历，并以此谋得一份好工作，对于王琪华来说这是很重要的事，然而她的法国男友并不这样认为。“刚开始的时候，我觉得我男友很懒，他不像我一样用功学习。”王棋画说。她的男友并没像很多中国学生一样急于找一份实习工作。
But over time, Wang learned to cut herself some slack and enjoy her leisure time, while her boyfriend started to pay more attention to the future.
而相处久了，事情却发生了转变。王棋画慢慢学会了自我放松，享受休闲时光，而男友反而开始更多地思考未来了。